you know, I COULD BE A VAMPIRE

You guys, we’ve been insensitive. 

We never even stopped to think about how all the love for “The Twilight Saga” might be hurting the precious fee-fees of our local Hollywood bro squad! And when we caught up with “Horrible Bosses” stars Jason Bateman and Charlie Day, they weren’t afraid to tell us just how deeply wounded they were.

“Nothing but Brits,” Jason sniffed. “Lots of Brits on stage.”

Charlie looked similarly miffed—and no wonder, ’cause he’s keeping careful track of just how slighted they’ve been by the crowd’s general preference for Englishmen. “Fifteen Brits,” he complained. “Why do we let them in here? They win all our awards, they get all our acting jobs… you know, I COULD BE A VAMPIRE.”


“Pattinson’s accent—is it real?” asked Jason. “Because I heard Boca.”

“I’m pretty sure he’s from Van Nuys,” Charlie chimed in.